Saturday, July 07, 2007

From: Squirrel Squad Squeaks

Hello, Minnesota!

Through careful scientific analysis, we have determined that the population of Minnesota is 3,780. Or, at the very least, that the population of slightly off-center folks at buzz.mn is 3,780.

Today, we got comments on our piece on fried chicken pizza. We get comments, but that piece was written a while back, so we thought it a bit odd. Then our friend and personal wine guru Benito wrote to let us know that we had been mentioned on buzz.mn.

We were mentioned by James Lileks, author of The Gallery of Regrettable Food. I have never expected Ruth Reichl to put our blog in Gourmet, but I had hoped to at least avoid being called regrettable. (I get enough of that from Mama Squirrel.)

It turns out that July 6, 2007 is National Fried Chicken Day. We were mentioned because James Lileks thinks fried chicken pizza is a good idea. And not only were we mentioned, but we were recognized as the official inventors of fried chicken pizza. Patent office here we come!

And in the mean time, hello, Minnesota! You're welcome back anytime. We'll keep the cast iron seasoned just in case anyone wants to drop in for a pizza.

From: The Soundcheck & The Fury

The Brittle Hymn


This is my blog. This is my blog on the Fourth of July. This is a short story about America, set in Kentucky in the long ago.

The soldier was three days gone from the war when he came upon the small river. Pleasant Means was his name. He was spent and weary with bones pleading and his uniform hung dank and muddy from him like some other self. He thought he might see them both in reflection on the small river, but shadows played hell upon the water with what little light of day remained.

Pleasant was a fresh twenty-one and not a fighting man. He was a poet, by nature if nothing else, and out of that poetic nature he sat and watched the water flow. The bend of the river, the crook of the thing. He had been deserting from the Southern side for those three days and some twenty miles and his bones were nearing some riotous brink. His feet were tombstones and he liked to have died but he hadn’t the vigor dying would demand.

It had rained through this day and the better part of the day before and so with each trudge through the woods his boots had picked up more mud and muck and he tried not to think too awfully hard about this in any symbolic way, the mud and muck and this other self dank and heavy upon him.

Pleasant couldn’t help but wonder if the war was coming home with him.

* * *

He rested at the river. His mind cleared and so was at clutter’s mercy. His mind drifted, as minds do. Hearts are heavy and this uniform is deadweight, Pleasant thought, but the mind is a weightless thing; it grows wings and goes to town.

He thought of home and the big river. He thought of a tavern, a taste of whiskey, a fiddle tune about the last flood or the next one. Mostly, he thought of a woman, her sad eyes looking out from under black hair, her salty mouth.

He thought of the folly of the moment, dropped to one knee, sank an inch, it may have been two. He thought the earth ought to just swallow him whole. Anyway, he wouldn’t be welcome at home as a deserter, a coward, a failure at the fine art of shooting strangers where they stood for what they wore, and the woman in question was otherwise engaged.

Can we please, he pleaded, get a little poetic justice here? But the earth wouldn’t have him, just soaked and muddied the knee of his dank, heavy grays.

He lowered his head, clasped his hands; he was in a handy position to pray if he had any praying to do. He closed his eyes and thought about that, gave it a good going-over in his mind, but in the end decided against waking Your Lord.

Pleasant Means was a poet, a heathen, a deserter, a coward, a mother’s son. His bones pleaded and his mind heard tell. He raised his head without opening his eyes, cried out without opening his mouth, heard a twig snap across the way but paid it no mind.

Pleasant was a drinker, a rounder, carouser, a little bit of a fiddle player. He was a weary traveler, something of a sage pilgrim, had an element of damn fool about him, too. He was a man out of time; early or late, he did not know which.

He opened his eyes to the river and the river moved on him. The river was a cracked whip. It was vengeance stretched taut and then gone slack.

He whiled away the day watching it. He aged a decade, became a small child. He blinked and became an old man looking back with aged wisdom too late in coming, a voice to faint to heed. Time was scattered, history strewn. America was a book held by its spine and shook; words leapt from the pages and fell as proclamations and rallying cries, sermons and psalms.

He blinked again and then sat for the longest thinking nothing whatsoever, but the sheer bulk of all that nothingness was too much for him and so he set it aside. He pondered madness and peace of mind and wondered were there three silver coins of difference between the two.

He sighed and it settled him. Time fell in line. Time took to its paces. Time marched like a good soldier. It was dusk, and now came another snap of twig and a crack of knuckles, and from across that small river came a voice.

“Well, if it ain’t my little brother, deserting from the Southern side.”

Jacob Means wore a bemused frown that didn’t clash all that much with his soldier’s blues.

Pleasant raised his head ever so slightly. He nodded. “How you, big brother?” he said.

“Been getting by,” Jacob said. “And you?”

“Just about barely.”

Family pleasantries thus exchanged, gun barrels were raised and aimed.

From: Paul Ryburn's Journal

From the MBJ: Prince Mongo's Planet to be converted into boutique hotel
Friday, July 06, 2007
In this print edition of this week's Memphis Business Journal, there's an article about plans for the space formerly occupied by Prince Mongo's Planet, a nightclub of the 1990s where 14-year-olds could go to get a beer and mingle with belligerent Navy recruits. A developer has a contract on the building and plans to renovate the building (56-60-62 South Front) into an upscale boutique hotel with 34 rooms. It will be called the Grade Hotel.

Furthermore, there will be meeting rooms, a restaurant, a coffee shop and a BOOKSTORE(!!!!) on the ground floor. The developer is hoping to attract students from the U of M law school, which will be moving downtown in 2009, as well as students from nearby medical, dental, and optometry schools, to the coffee shop. He hopes to have clean-up crews in the building by September. The hotel's grand opening could happen as little as 18 months from then, with the ground-floor businesses open sooner.

Great news for Downtown! Unless you're a freshman in high school and were hoping Mongo's would reopen so you'd have a place to drink.
posted by Paul Ryburn

From: The ChockleyBlogs

Firecracker, Firecracker, Siss Boom Bah


Chip and I have picked up our running efforts of late, mostly because our friend RJA challenged us to run a 5K with him. He's been so happy to be doing so much running that his enthusiasm was contagious. But while Chip and I have enjoyed the running on some level, on others we've found it quite depressing. You know how professional athletes are considered old by the time they hit their mid-30s? Now that I'm there, it totally makes sense. My toe hurts. Chip's knee hurts. Of course my knee hurts. And sometimes my back. And maybe Chip's heel. It's not debilitating, just humbling to realize how quickly one's body can turn on you.


So last night we ran the Firecracker 5K. The boys soon left me way behind, but I'll catch up with them sooner or later. I finished in 31:45, Chip in 30 flat, and RJA in 27:09. I definitely want to break 30 minutes next time, but I think I'll take a day off from my training to celebrate our nation's awesomeness. And to rest my toe.

(The pictures aren't relevant at all. They're just cute. Sorry!)

From: 55-40 Memphis

A.B.C.

Whenever you listen to a Republican operative commenting on the Democratic primary race, I want you to notice something. Pay attention as to which candidate gets the most hits and snarks, and which candidate is declared the apparent front runner. Make a note and move onto the next operative. Do you see a pattern?

Expand your awareness. Take in what all the Republicans are saying about the Democratic candidates. Read the bloggers, too. Make note of which candidates get trashed most often, and which are pretty much left alone. As if the Republicans are purposely holding their fire. Do you see a pattern yet?

I'll give you a hint: The Democratic candidate the Republicans most love to trash goes by the initials A.B.C. On the other hand, the candidate they're leaving alone is the one that has the worst negatives in the polls.

Factor in something else. Look at the messaging of the Republican candidates. What is the common theme among them? What the single most wonderful trait of every last one of them? (Except the libertarian.) Chris Matthews sees it. Do you?

Is it "strong on national security?"

Nope. It's manliness.

That should tell you who the Republicans want to win the Democratic primary campaign and they're gearing up to face in the general. They want it so bad they're having a tough time keeping a straight face. They ache for it. They're having political woodies over this candidate because if that's whom they will face, they know they win in 2008.

The scary part is that they're right.

And that's the top reason I'm voting for A.B.C.

From: at home she feels like a tourist

When in Memphis....



It occurred to me as soon as I posted the previous entry that I had only looked at one side of a two-sided problematic. When addressing the relationship between a city and outsiders, one can examine both how city residents should receive the outsiders, and how outsiders should approach their new city. The old platitude "when in Rome, do as the Romans do" offers one rather simplistic response to the latter issue. Adapt and assimilate, it suggests.

On one level, this advice is obviously correct. If you are visiting a city where tipping is considered a rude affront, then you shouldn't leave a tip. If people pass on the right and walk on the left, then for reasons both practical and ethical, you shouldn't plow through a line of walkers on the left.

OK - but: what if you are visiting an explicitly racist city? What if you're a committed vegetarian in a city where venison is the local specialty? What if you're part of a gay couple in a city where homosexuality is considered a moral affront and gays are advised to stay very, very closeted? What if the local custom involves pelting stones at stray animals...or stoning adulteresses?

At what point does a cultural variation cease to be a fairly indifferent matter of local custom and become a political or moral issue which might call for outspoken public defiance?

Just a few hypothetical questions here. I'm not suggesting that Memphians pelt stones at stray animals or stone adulteresses - the cultural differences between Memphis and San Francisco certainly aren't that dramatic. But I'm using a few intentionally extreme examples to point out that, while we all accept the "when in Rome" principle up to a point, there is a line somewhere, beyond which even the responsible outsider should not necessarily simply accept local "custom" as such. Where does this line lie? Where exactly is the critical difference between boorishly refusing to respect the local culture, and taking an ethical stand against cruel or unjust local practices? Or even just an aesthetic stand against, for example, an ugly architectural craze in a city you're visiting?

A lot of questions in this post with no answers. I'm just trying to introduce a complicated problem for now; in the next post (whenever that comes) I will try to work out how this problem applies to an outsider in Memphis, specifically.
posted by fearlessvk